Here is to you.

I keep wondering if we ever affected you, or if you think about us. It's hard to tell, you are a boy and sometimes boys pretend things to seem more manly. I guess I could drive to Vernal and probably find you working for the police department, but you might not want to see me, so I'll hide behind a bush just to see what your life is like now. Sometimes that's how friendships end up.

Jesus and bodies of water are the two things that really keep me feeling alive. The moment your chest gets tight from the cold pushing its way into your heart and all around you the trees tower so that is all you can see. Sitting in the dark with the people you love, praying to God, so thankful He's filled our lives with purpose and hope. Those things are what makes me keep going and living life to the fullest, especially in those moments.

I keep thinking of the little blissful moments of next week, on the beach. I can't wait to leave on Saturday mornin' coffee in hand, drivin into empty Nevada with my love, listening to the National serenading us on the 80. Waking up to the ocean just footsteps away, being able to worship my Savior looking at one of the most beautiful scenes on the earth. Staying up late, and waking up early occasionally (if we want) and napping in between. Just exploring, relaxing, and catching up with family. I hope it's a retreat to the mind and body.

I cut off all my hair, well nearly all. It feels so good, when I glance at myself in the mirror I see a boy, but at least it's a cute boy who wears mascara. I really am happy about it though. Sometimes I don't even want to look like a girl very much. Especially in the summer.

Its crazy summer is over in a monthish, I'm really not ready, so here's to making the most of this month.